Obssession

This fantasy. This story. This imagination.

I have this something in my head. It won't go away. It's been there for awhile now. They say Pisceans are dreamers. They are so true. It's in my head before bed. It's there when I wake up. It's there when I'm on the road. It's there when I work. It's there when I eat. It's there when I'm in the showers. It's there even though I'm in the company of others. It's there no matter what I'm doing. I became oblivious to everything around me. My surroundings turned to an array of gray clouds with my focus locked on this thing running around inside my head.

With time, it changes. My mind playing different kinds of versions of it. Scene after scene. Actions after actions. Expressions after expressions. My mind, twisting the original one into so many other possibilities. I can lay all day on the couch, starring into the ceiling, doing nothing but 'fiddling' with it in my head. Other chores doesn't seem to matter as I do not have the will to do any other thing but to just let my imaginations run wild. To create more stories. To allow my fantasies run high to another level. Nothing in it is for real. Nothing in it is possible. It's just something to escape to. Something to dream. I 'wake up' time after time to slap myself back to reality, only to return to the couch a few minutes later, doing the same thing over again.

I didn't know what else to call it other than obssession. Obssessed with something not real. Pouring so much time into something that will not happen. Yet, it gives so much pleasure and satisfaction to just have a thought about it. Something far inside, deep into the corner some where, slightly wished that wouldn't it be good if it does come true? That it'll bring me out there. Into the stories. Into the dream. Into the fantasies. Where I can live the impossible. Where I can make the stories turn true for myself.....

Is it just me or is there someone else who does the same things I did?